Grammer

So I'm homophonically dyslexic. When proof reading my latest draft multiple times, I never catch a word that is spelled correctly and sounds correct (at least in my head). For instance, my last blog uses the word "boarder", when it should be "border". You could argue that boarder isn't a word, but the snowboarder inside me might bash you in head with said board.

I got stopped last night by road construction on I84 on my way home. It was late, and I was tired. Sitting there in the stop and go nonsense that makes me crave owning a helicopter, I started thinking about the word construction. "Road Construction" (as all the signs alluded to) would imply that a road is being built. However, since Portland is not graceful enough to build new roads, is was merely maintenance. Yet, the signs say construction. The signs always read construction even when over 90% (not verified) of the time it is maintenance. This has been going on long enough such that people refer to any type of road work as "road construction". I say we take a stand and demand new signs that properly identify the type of work being done, i.e. maintenance. Improper word use has affected us all in a manner that we don't realize.  I 'm not constructing my car when I change the oil.

Now on to my real point, which is that we need to require new signs for all road maintenance.  Here is a quick breakdown of what will happen:

1. A committee will create the new bill that mandates a change to "construction" signs.
2. Another committee will determine the proper terminology for the new signs and how to implement their usage.
3. A new task force will enforce the change
4. Construction crews will be forced to purchase new signs (thus spurring the economy).
5. Construction crews will be forced to dedicate new positions to self regulate correct sign usage (thus spurring job growth).
6. Drivers will be more aware that a new road is not being constructed to alleviate traffic congestion which will make them to accept things as they are and drive more defensively and/or less often. The drivers will then notice better driving results in using less fuel (thus reducing emissions and saving the drivers money).
7. The drivers will use the excess cash to go shopping at the mall (thus spurring the economy). 
8. Drivers will use the extra time engaging in physical activities (thus reducing obesity).

It should be apparent that adding more bureaucracy to the department of transportation is going to solve most of our national problems. Think about this next time you see an orange sign.